My Incompetent Eyeballs

Augh! I have freak eyes!

I had an eye exam about a year and a couple months ago, but I either didn’t really have the time to go glasses shopping or I couldn’t find frames I liked when I did go shopping (I’m really picky — also, new baby, and pregnancy and nursing can throw off an Rx). I was just going to wait till my next exam to get new glasses, because the new prescription really wasn’t that far off from the old, but then my frames broke and I was forced to get new ones. I’ve had this prescription since 2008, and the frames since 2009 (the first pair broke barely a year after I got them), so it’s definitely time.

I went to Costco, because I’ve gotten glasses there before and had no trouble with them (and I also don’t want to spend more than $150 on glasses while I have two active little boys climbing on me all day). I spent about $130 and got cute frames, polycarbonate lenses, and anti-reflective coating (yeah, it’s a pain to keep clean, but I’ve found I’ve become less tolerant to glare over the past few years, especially while driving at night).

When they came in, seven days later (while the earpiece that broke off my old glasses has been held on by masking tape, cleverly wrapped and colored with brown Sharpie), I could see great far away and up close, but when I used peripheral or looked down, there was major distortion. The ground was too close, like I had bifocals (which I don’t), and everything else was like looking sideways through aquarium glass. Ugh! I took them to the optical shop in my doctor’s office after trying to wear them for most of a week, and optical confirmed that the prescription matched, but suggested that maybe my eyes were too sensitive for the polycarb lenses. Bummer! So, I took them back to Costco and asked them to exchange the lenses for regular plastic. The lady there tried to flatten the frames a little, but that didn’t help, either.

Seven days later, the new glasses came in! Yay! But when I put them on, everything was still just a bit off. Boo! 😦 The floor was still a little too close, and there was distortion on the sides, but it wasn’t as bad as before. I decided to give them another shot, but after another couple of days of eye fatigue and resulting irritability (apparently, wonky vision makes me angry, not to mention nauseous), I gave up.

I’d made an eye doctor appointment when they called to ask if I needed one, because it was the only opening in April (and if I was going to need one, earlier is better than later). I kept the appointment (which was at 7:30 this morning — bleh), and ended up not even seeing the doctor at all (grr!), because they just sent me back to optical, who determined that it was the distance of the lenses from my eyes and the “base curvature” of the lens that was giving me all the trouble.

*Sob!* Stupid eyes! I’ve never had this problem before! 😦

So I took them back to Costco today, asked them very nicely if I can return the glasses so they match the base curvature of the new lens (which is currently about four & 3/4) to the base curvature of the old lens (about six), and will have to wait another seven (to ten) days for my new glasses to come in. Meh.

(I have tried to get contacts in the past, but was told by the first optometrist that I didn’t produce enough tears, and the second told me that the lenses for dry eyes cannot be made precise enough for my prescription, which is not strong, but is apparently very demandingly fine. Stupid eyes.)

I don’t know what I’m going to do if the next pair doesn’t work. I might have to go to a different eye doctor, though…

Hello! I’m coming back from the future to say that this goes on for a long, loooong time — and it only gets worse. Here is the saga in full (more to be added later):